|
| Blog| Home | Disclaimer | Contact Us | Links | Submit Jokes | Advertise Here | Ecards |
||||
![]() |
||||
|
Funny jokes
|
Clean Jokes Q: What do Mohammed and Douglas Adams have in common? A: A deep, abiding respect for the value of a towel on the head. Three patients in a mental institution prepare for an examination given by the head psychiatrist. If the patients pass the exam, they will be free to leave the hospital. However, if they fail, the institution will detain them for seven years. The doctor takes the three patients to the top of a diving board overlooking an empty swimming pool, and asks the first patient to jump. The first patient jumps head first into the pool and breaks both arms. Then the second patient jumps and breaks both legs. The third patient looks over the side and refuses to jump. "Congratulations! You're a free man. Just tell me why didn't you jump?" asked the doctor. To which the third patient answered, "Well Doc, I can't swim!" Why isn't Mexico in the Olympics?... Because everyone that can swim, jump, climb, and sprint are already over the Border.. Three engineers and three accountants are traveling by train to a conference. At the station, the three accountants each buy tickets and watch as the three engineers buy only a single ticket. "How are three people going to travel on only one ticket?" asks an accountant. "Watch and you'll see," answers an engineer. They all board the train. The accountants take their respective seats but all three engineers cram into a restroom and close the door behind them. Shortly after the train has departed, the conductor comes around collecting tickets. He knocks on the restroom door and says, "Ticket, please." The door opens just a crack and a single arm emerges with a ticket in hand. The conductor takes it and moves on. The accountants saw this and agreed it was quite a clever idea. So after the conference, the accountants decide to copy the engineers on the return trip and save some money (being clever with money, and all). When they get to the station they buy a single ticket for the return trip. To their astonishment, the engineers don't buy a ticket at all. "How are you going to travel without a ticket?" says one perplexed accountant. "Watch and you'll see," answers an engineer. When they board the train the three accountants cram into a restroom and the three engineers cram into another one nearby. The train departs. Shortly afterward, one of the engineers leaves his restroom and walks over to the restroom where the accountants are hiding. He knocks on the door and says, "Ticket, please." A Chinese man walks into a bar in America late one night and he sees Steven Spielberg. As he was a great fan of his movies, he rushes over to him, and asks for his autograph. Instead, Spielberg gives him a slap and says, "You Chinese people bombed our Pearl Harbor, get outta here."The astonished Chinese man replied, "It was not the Chinese who bombed your Pearl Harbour, it was the Japanese". "Chinese, Japanese, Taiwanese your all the same," replied Spielberg. In return, the Chinese man gives Spielberg a slap and
says, "You sank the Titanic, my forefathers were on that
ship."Shocked, Spielberg replies, "It was the iceberg that sank
the ship, not me."The Chinese man, replies,"Iceberg, Spielberg,
Carsberg, you're all the same." |
Prank calls |
||
| Laloo
Jokes | Cricket
Commentary Jokes | Management
Lessons | Funny
Bumper Stickers | Funny
Cartoons
| Funny
Paki Jokes | Wedding
Jokes | Bollywood
Jokes | Bollywood
Dialogues | Funny
Animal Jokes | Random
Jokes | Funny
Party Songs | Barack
Obama Jokes | Hillary
Clinton Jokes |
Doctor
Jokes | Engineer
Jokes | Accountant
Jokes | Insurance
Agent Jokes | Funny
Animations | Cartoon
Pictures | Funny
Signs | Optical
Illusions | Funny
Pics | Munnabhai
Jokes |
| Privacy Policy |
©Copyright 2008 JokesPrank.Com. All Rights Reserved